There are about 12 � 15 people who read my diary on a regular basis. I look at my stats page mostly every day to see how many people took a gander. I also like getting comments because then I can see how people feel, or if they are enjoying reading it or if I�ve touched something inside. The whole thing kind of reminds me of being in grade school.
I remember in elementary school when we would be picking teams for some sports event or even a class competition (like a spell-a-thon or math-a-thon or game or something). I remember the feeling of sitting there (or standing there) thinking �Pick me, pick me� and then the sadness when I wasn�t chosen, time after time after time. I remember that we would elect class presidents or other officers. I think the only time I won was when no one else was running. There was always this need to be popular, to be liked, to know that people would pick me.
Being on diaryland reminds me of this in some ways. I get excited when I see people are reading my diary. I have little �Sally Field� moments � �You like me, you really like me.� And if you leave a comment, I feel even better. You liked me enough to respond. It�s nice to be chosen.
About a month ago, I purchased my year�s Supergold membership. So now I have free banner ads. I haven�t placed any yet. Don�t know how to capture my essence. Don�t know what will grab the reader�s eye. And when I do place them, I�ll feel all this pressure to be witty, to be �cool� so that I can be chosen. So that they�ll pick me. We never really leave elementary school.
So, if you read me, if you like me, if you keep coming back, leave me a comment. Tell me why you came, tell me why you stay.
