On my right thigh, I have a bruise about the size of a hockey puck. Considering I have been sick in bed for the last two days, I have no idea where this came from. It is a mystery. I wish I could say that I�ve been hanging from the ceiling having wild sex, but I just can�t. I often find mysterious bruises on my body. I have no idea where they come from. I just wake up in the morning and they are there. Maybe my body leads a double life when I�m asleep. I just wish I was conscious to enjoy the fun. I don�t like the idea that my body is out having fun without me.
I wonder what it would be like if I grew a beard. Seriously, I must spend most of my day plucking chin hairs. And I�m totally obsessed with it too. If I feel even the tiniest hair, I cannot stop picking at my face until it is GONE. I walk around looking like I�m insane�well, I am so I guess it�s not a far stretch. But really, if beards on women every come into fashion, I�ll be so popular.
I want to hold a baby. I want to hold a little newborn baby and have it fall asleep in my arms. Really, there is nothing better in this world than holding a sleeping baby. The other day, I was racking my brain trying to think if I know anyone with a baby. I drew a blank. I think this is the first time in my life I don�t know anyone with a baby. Although, my friend Jane is having a baby in May, so I told her to just bake that little thing a little quicker, Auntie Janet wants to hold a baby. I used to be a preschool teacher, and for a year I worked in the infant room. No shortage of babies there. I really miss that. I miss holding babies. Not enough to indiscriminately run out and get pregnant though. But hey, if any of you have a baby and want a break, let me know. I�m all over it.
