Okay, so imagine this...
You wake up one day and your little puppy (please add french acccent now) FiFi LePew is not feeling well. You say "Oh, my little baybay (remember the accent folks), my little puppikins, my fifi-pie, why don't you come to work with me so you won't be sad and lonely and insecure that I am leaving you at home all time"? (Please remove french accent now)
Or how about this:
Gosh, I wish I could go to the gym during my lunch hour but with travel time and the fact that I'll need a shower, I really won't have time for a workout. Oh, wait *I* work for a company with an on-site gym and showers equipped soap and shampoo and conditioner and a locker room to store my gear. Oh, but after that workout and shower, I'm too tired to leave this shower room, I'll just sit in this comfy chair and read a magazine for a few minutes.
Here's another one:
Gosh, I don't have a lot to do today. I'm just feeling kind of restless. "Hey Joe-Bob, whatcher doing?"
"Not a thing Honey-Rae (Now sunstarr I know you and Ben will be able to hear my wonderful country accent with this snippet of imaginged conversation)
"Well Joe-Bob, you got anything important to do?"
"Nope, how about you Honey-Rae?"
"Not a thing until my meeting at 4 Joe-Bob" (and yes it IS important that I keep using those names, I mean, come on... "Let's go to the game room for a spell." So off you go to play "wii" or pool, or air hockey or ping pong or watch jerry springer or play poker, or pretty much anything you can imagine.
So basically, imagine one of THE most employee friendly companies in the universe. Got that part down?
Now take this company with 1100 employees (90% of whom work remotely) that has no training department and has an initiative to grow their online training content in the next 2 years but they have 1.5 employees in the "training department" who merely manage websites (front end and back end administration) but do not "train", do not know "training" and have no idea what it means to "create content". Now enter Janet, fresh from her time off and ready to take the job by storm.
Welcome to my first day on the job. Come by tomorrow, I'll take you to our "lunch room" and fix you some company sponsored oatmeal and then we can chat in front of Oprah or Ellen or Jerry depending on the time. See you soon!
BTW dragprincess, my title was for you!
As for the rest of you d-landers that I have come to consider family, I talked of all of you today (completely nameless and anonymously) asn i discussed the benefits of blogging (the network of friends you can make, the support, the love, OH the LOVE, somebody bring me a tissue), as the company wants to get on board with some kind of myspace blogging kind of thing, so even though I haven't linked your diary by name, know that you were on my mind and in my thoughts and heart today. God Bless Us Everyone.
Thanks Timmy. Come to work with me tomorrow, you won't be hungry anymore, free oatmeal in the breakroom! Meetcha there at 8:15. I'll be the one in the sweats. (Oh yeah, did I mention that people there dress in sweats? or suits? or whatever they feel like that day... Now chew on that and realize that OZ does exist.
God, I can't stop, Janet's in her happy place. "sigh".
