Sometimes I look in the mirror and I don�t like what I see. And I�m not talking about my body here. I�m talking about my soul, about the choices I make, the way I treat myself. And the way I treat others. But mostly the way I treat myself.
Every time I look myself in the eye, I have to answer this question �Am I doing right by myself?�. And the answer is usually no. I�m not. I am making choices that are about the happiness of others. I�m making choices that are about the moment and not the long term. I am making choices that compromise myself. My motto �Live life without regrets� is being stomped on. Not by others, by myself. Because I know, that in the long run, I�m going to regret that I didn�t treat myself better. I�m going to regret that I didn�t make choices that celebrated me. I am going to regret how I�ve turned myself into an emotional prostitute.
I am a woman of words. It is so easy to say things. It is harder to do them. It is harder to mean them. It is hardest of all to embrace them. When it comes to dating, I always say words are meaningless. The guy can say whatever the hell he wants but I won�t believe him if his actions don�t match his words. So why should I believe my own words to myself if my actions don�t match. If I say that I want to put myself first and then make choices that I know will hurt me, choices that compromise me, choices that make me feel like I am selling out on myself, then do I really love myself?
